imatriarch

i am cold. i have layers of clothes on me and furry lined boots on. Why am I still cold?

kind of like today. I go to bed positive about the next day and sometimes the dark cloud comes over me luring me into isolation. I’m not lazy. So then why do I want to close my eyes to the world? I wanted to work on the William Control tracks but my creativity is jarred. It’s not something you can “snap” out of. It’s like a passing storm…you just have to wait it out. Sometimes it’s only hours. Sometimes it can be days. 

the cat is meowing for no reason and I feel irritated. The memory of last nights phone call plays as My dad tells me he hates my new red hair. I can see snow on top of the mountains outside. beautiful. I want to be on the other side of that mountain…wherever that is. (cat still meowing) Last night he took a big disgusting poop in my favorite wooden salad bowl. why? Maybe the cat feels like I do.